Is it enough to know someone loves you from a distance?

What sustained us for many years, video calls, heart emojis, goodnight voice messages, will it be enough again?

How much have I taken for granted in these last couple years? Dinners in front of the TV? Brushing off your advances? Waking up to the sound of your snoring, how many nights spent sleeping in separate rooms? Nights on the couch not wrapped in each others arms?

Is this karma? How evil was I in a past life to inflict this suffering on us? Will it be tenfold in the next life for my selfishness today? I pray you're doomed to be hurt by me again. Let time be cyclical and we'll be together again. I'm slipping away. I'm feeding the cat, don't worry. She misses you too.